I filed a Transfer Agreement Guarantee with my counselor two months ago. It was really late and all, but I managed to get it in, courtesy of my very kind counselor. Today, I just got an email that I was approved! I believe this means I have a guaranteed spot to major in Biology at University of California Davis, one of the three UCs I applied to when I was a senior in highschool and got rejected! Now that I might be able to attend, I'm excited, but at the same time, I'm a little anxious.

Back in highschool, I applied for UC Merced and UC Berkeley as well. Berkeley rejected me, but Merced accepted me. At the time, I didn't know what Merced had for me, and I basically knew nothing about universities. I just applied for what I heard was good, and Merced was just close to one of the houses we owned in that area. I decided to attend a community college close to home instead for two main reasons.

1) The first was that I wasn't sure where I wanted to go, really. The college process was pushed on me so hard and I didn't understand quite the impact of whatever college I would pick. I figured I'd attend a CC to help me realize my ambitions, which I did. I'm very happy with my choice.

2) Second, the first two years of undergraduate education is the same everywhere, or so I heard. It would be much cheaper if I did my two years at CC.

My time at community college so far as been a rough path, but I finally realize what I want to do and what I have to do to get there. My confidence has been busted several times along the way, but now.. Hahah, well, let's just say I learned a lot more about myself than I ever did in the past 1 1/2 year. I feel really.. accomplished somewhat.

But it's too early to celebrate! There's still lots of things to do! I just felt I had to post about this because I'm happy! There were many points post-high school where I really thought I screwed up my future, but I know that's not so. Life is long enough for us to make mistakes and make up for them. (X

I wonder how I should go about thanking my counselor. I don't speak to her often, and I'm afraid of her, but I'm really grateful she did this for me as a rush job. Maybe I should see her again to tell her I got approved? Or maybe I should do that after I send an application to UCD to make things set in stone. XD

My greatest enemy these days has been fear. I really hate the awkward moments in classes where there's dead silence because nobody dares to answer the teacher, or even make a guess to the question. Why? Because we're afraid to be wrong! (Except my friend Christa who decided not to answer becuase she wanted to see what the teacher would do if no one piped up. I told her afterwards she was sadistic. XD)

That's some weird fear I have to get over myself. I hate leaving class with a sinking feeling of  "I should have just said something, even if I end up being wrong!" I get so angry at myself for wimping out just because I was afraid. It doesn't make me feel good at all! I'm a coward! XD

One of these days I'll get over it, maybe. The first step is to speak up! (And in a clear voice, too. No mumbling!)

Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.

Calvin Coolidge
30th president of US (1872 - 1933)

I read this interesting quote on this sheet that gets handed out weekly from church. At first I didn't get it so I had to read it a second time, and when I finally got to the end, I almost teared up. (At the same time, I was like, "Why are you getting so emotional over this?"). I just felt persistent was, or rather is, a word that describes a lot of what I've been doing and having to do lately. I'm not the only one, I know, and I'm definitely not alienating anyone, but it just made me think, that's all. Success or failure, I think whatever it is that sparks or crushes a set goal, can never match up to the impressive valor of being persistent. If you reach success, that's great! You can look back at what it took to get there. If it's a failure, it's picking up where you left off or starting over that's really impressive.

That last sentence was what I really wanted to talk about. It's really hard to get up again when you fail miserably or lose everything you've worked hard on. It's one of the hardest things to do ever, but it's definitely to be admired. Oh, no, I'm not talking about anything super serious. It can apply to anything-- like this morning, I typed up a whole entry and then lost it because the submit button didn't send it entirely through. I was so angry, but then I had to decide on a choice: Should I write it again, or just forget it?

I ended up writing something completely different. Oh well! In any case, I'll be copying this entire entry, juuust in case. XD

And, a quick random rabble.--
Mass was pretty interesting today. I like that priest, though I feel terrible I don't know his name. He seems very educated, having to read the thoughts of a young saint in Latin. And during the breaking of the bread, whenever a priest changes his voice to some deep treble for singing a line or two all holy-like, I'm really moved. He was talking about how when he was young and went Trick-or-Treating, he went as St. Francis of Assisi, and his sister went as some woman (Was her name Veronica? I don't know the story) who wiped Jesus Christ's face. She carried a pillow case with Jesus' face printed on it. I couldn't help but laugh at this story. Trick-or-Treating as holy/Bible figures? That's hardcore! (Though I must admit it struck me as funny also because just yesterday I was reading some article written by a lady from some church saying that Halloween is the counter-holiday to Christmas, and that the devil was outt o get everyone through candy. It was just amusing how church people can have such contrasting thoughts regarding some things. Some will celebrate it, and some abhor it!)

Huh? What was the purpose of today's mass? It's All Saint's Day, I think! There was a moral or something about how the greatest saints are regular people just like us. I know that, but I think it's that humanity that makes them so admirable. I don't ever plan on being a saint, but they sure are good role models/pedestals of inspiration!

I don't normally pull religion out like that, but I just thought today had a good lesson to it and I felt like reminiscing over it. (X

I'll make this as brief and pithy as possible, because I don't want to dwell too much into it and I know I make things get really long-winded.

I don't quite feel my family has been the same since the IRS incident. Everyone has become a little detached, and it's so hard for me to take, considering they're people who are the closest to me. I guess if I couple in the fact that I'm spending more time in school and having to do things like drive myself to places I have to be at, it is really hard to believe that things can't be what they were before. I know change is a part of growing up, but it's so hard. It's crazy how happy and old cheerful times can disappear or end, even though I know they can't stay like they are forever.

I'll cope, though. I'm the kind of person that likes to believe that if I want something like reliving those days, I have to make new memories! That in itself isn't that difficult, but it's starting that's hard. I like what Nagase Tomoya said in newshfan 's subbed 2001 sports day thing. Something along the lines of "It's up to me to get the results I want". It's about sports, but hey, still inspirational!

Life is funny, which makes it a little bit hard for me to decide what to do sometimes.

Also, reading about some f-list updates about Koichi's proposed 100 shows of Endless Shock, new album, solocon.. I know that sounds and is a lot of work, but I'd rather feel happy for him than be worried. XD Reading how some people feel about makes me kind of depressed, but I have no doubt he'll work hard. Rather than worrying that he'll forget to eat, I'd prefer to think he'll take better care of himself and eat well. Plus, he has Pan. That's his energy source right there. (X!

That said, I feel that way about a lot of you, too! I thought about what rurun said, and I won't specify what, but I would rather feel happy for any of you than worried. I just feel optimism is an empowering feeling, that's all. I would think some people wouldn't want anyone to worry about them..? Perhaps they'd rather have others believe them?

Alas, I do digress. It's Halloween today in the US, and I don't know where else, but whether ornot you celebrate this holiday, I hope everyone has a good one. n_n

I got RuRun's letter on Sunday, but due to school and busy work, I didn't find time to scan it until now. @_@

I have always, always, ALWAYS valued handwritten letters since 3rd grade. At that time before I ever discovered the convenience and speed of instant messaging an emails, I sent letter to friends at school. We exchanged cute stationary and stickers, and it was always fun. Even after my 3rd grade friend moved to Colorado, because I could still exchange letters with her, it was still a heartfelt thing to do. I love to write letters by hand.

I stopped eventually because my mom would always say "Why don't you just email!! It doesn't cost stamps!!" when I ask her for some stamps to mail letters. But now I really want to send them, and not just to Rurun. XD <33

In any case... Onto the surprise! It's a cuuuut. 8D

(  Sharing, not 'cause Gally told me to, but because her post made me want to share, too. XD )

I'd hate to make my post sound all emo and angsty, but it's something about myself that I see resurfacing several times whenever I get upset and decide to raise a fuss. I'd like to think I'm grown up about matters, but gosh darn it, I'm such a kid. It's a flaw of mine that I don't think gets much spotlight, because it's only revealed with my family (because they're the only ones who will put up with you, no matter how ridiculous you get), so of course I'm grateful that thye're practically one of the only people in the world who will still love me no matter what.

By now, I'm not being so much as emo about it anymore.. How I feel about being angry fluctuates fast, and right now it's at an optimistic part, which is a good thing. Right now I'm looking at my anger as another learning opportunity for improvement. Like I said, whenever I get upset, recently it always boils down to the end of "I didn't change this time".

( Cut because it's boring, but I won't hide my personal feelings-- my true nature. XD )

But maybe that's why I won't be right because I'm such a kid about it. And if I'm right about it even once, I'll want to be right again. Never being right.. Maybe that's the important thing here.. Because as long as I'm never right, I can keep learning and be reminded that I still have ways to go as a person.

In regards to the previous journal post, dang, Colorgenics. Boy did I ride on such a life-coaster. It's SO been going up and down, and another up (or down) is on its way. I'm okay, though. I just have to hang on and stuff~ I think I'll be okay because I'm pretty much optimistic or positive about things. I'm only in trouble when I start emo-ing out like this.

Sometimes I look at my journal and look at the last post I made, which happened to be the colorgenics one. I've been fond of my results for that one, because at the time, I thought it reflected me perfectly. It said everything I liked about myself at the time, and hoped it wouldn't change too much. I'm throwing in the past tense here because, well, I don't think it's gone. I still like it even now, and was partially afraid that if I took it again, it wouldn't say that about be anymore. I took it again, anyway, because my demeanor now is different from then because of some things I'm going through (Generally, I mean. There's nothing tragic or anything that's angering me specifically right now. Everybody goes through things!), and I was curious what Colorgenics would say about me now and if it would brighten up my spirits again.

Again, the link is www.goldinuniverse.com

( So, let's take a look at what it said this time! )
Though I must admit I never wished for winning a lottery. It's close though. I did wish problems would just go away, or rather, disappear. I'm not talking about problems like for math, but financial ones, or family ones. That is to say, I'm not totally depressed right now. I'm just stating the truth. XD

I like that "charming" "leader" continues to be there. XD That's reassuring! I think, technically, it restates some of the things from last time, but matches it with how I'm feeling right now, so I feel that's accurate enough. Hurrah for being the same, even if I could use some work to become a better person. n_n

This is sooooo cool. I'm not trying to link anyone to an unsafe site. It's just a simple color picking thing that will evaluate your personality according to the colors you choose. I normally don't post quiz or meme things, but this is so amusing and I like how accurate it was for me. XD

http://www.goldinuniverse.com/

( Here's my results! )

Hahah, I'm not feeling crappy or anything, I just wanted to write about this. n_n;

I'm mad at her for wearing make-up because she doesn't need it. She really doesn't, and I'm not just saying that because I don't wear make-up myself. Some people look good with it, but her, just no. =/ All she uses right now is black eye-liner, but it looks so odd. Her hair is in her fave all the time anyway, why need to outline it in more shadows?

I'm upset and I don't know what to do about it. It's her choice, so I don't say anything about it, but I hate it. This must be what a teenager is like. I never knew they could be so rebellious and make such stupid decisions based on peer pressure. I thought it was just a TV kind of thing, and even so, I never expected my own sister to be like that, too. I thought she'd be better than that.

Now I really know I can never have kids. I thought about it the other day, and it must be tough for parents to tell their kid not to do something, and then they do it. I was just thinking how upset I get when I tell the people I care about not to do something rash, hoping that maybe they'd listen to what I hope is a voice of reason, but then they don't change at all. I would hope that talking about feelings and stuff would make people feel better, but I've learned that with some people, even if they do talk to you, they don't change anything. (Not that Tomo is one of them, I'm thinking of another guy. XD)

But, gosh, she really doesn't need it. She seriously looks so generic that if I try to imagine her right now, I can only think of her in the one same outfit. She never looks different with her sense of dress. I can't complain about her clothes as much as her make-up, because of everything, the make-up is the weirdest.

I HOPE SHE WILL GROW UP AND LOOK BACK ON THE HER RIGHT NOW AND THINK IT'S RIDICULOUS.

Oh yeah, vote for Skullies?
http://www.neopets.com/beauty/details.phtml?pet=Skullies

Why is it in dreams, everything you do just seems.. slower?

Last night I had a dream that I was in a class.. I think it was history or some kind of social science class, but for some reason we were doing math. (I'm serious, it wasn't a math class. I'm not mistaken.) So there's this word problem that's pretty simple. There were only three variables that had to be dealt with, but for some reason I kept getting distracted. I couldn't multiply right, and the biggest number was only in the thousands. I tried and tried, but for some reason the numbers did not register in my mind. I spent over 3 in-dream minutes on one simple multiplication, until I finally asked the teacher if I could use my calculator. MAN I WAS SO PISSED WHEN I TOOK IT OUT. Seriously, it was so easy, but my dream-mind was so cloudy I couldn't focus on the math so I had to resort to it. Plus, it turned out the problem I was doing was on a test, and I was out for like, 3/4 of the time allowed for test-taking because I apparently "fell asleep" during class. I woke up before I found out if I knew the answer, but I was pretty pissed that my brain wasn't processing fast enough to get me a math answer. Like I need more damage to my confidence in my math.

And this isn't the FIRST time I had a math dream. No, no. I've had math dreams many times, but they always piss me off 'cause I can't get the answer. Like, I had this one one time where I had simple problems to do like, 3x3 or 4+1 and it took me about 3 in-dream minutes to get an answer. I was so cheesed off.

Seriously, my math confidence is so low. Everytime I bang my head or something happens where I could inadvertently lose some brain cells, the first thing I always ask myself is "What's 3x3?" like it's one of the things I want to remember if I ever had brain failure.

... 6.

November 30th passed three days ago, but here's my list. XD I haven't been drawing everyday exactly, but I have been drawing on lots of days, and I think I lost some as the days went by. I'm still searching around for them and uploading. Likewise, there might have some that are already uploaded but I haven't had the chance to sort them out yet. So this list should have more, even if I did skip quite a number of days.

The challenge was to draw the same character everyday from June 1 until November 30. I chose to draw Zombb

( LIST - STAARRRTOOO!! (It's a long list.) )

Bolol, I don't need this to be private, but I am a little embarrassed that this nearly pointless rant will be seen by people on my friends list. XD

I think I know why I always feel like a kid, still.

It's 'cause all women in love are girls.

And I'm constantly in love. |D I give it, I receive it, I'm thriving in it. Yay.

This kind of thing is usually written during a happy kind of mood, right? Well, I'm not in a super great happy mood right now, but I still think about that kind of thing.

My sister, who happens to be my best friend in the whole world, seems to find annoyance with me lately. My mom, too.

So that got me thinking about what kind of nuisance I am. I like to talk a lot, so it's difficult for me to limit myself in what I want to talk about to my closest friends.

I thought about it, how even I am a pain to even my most favorite people, and decided that if the people around me can't even tolerate me that much, it would be impossible to find someone else who can take all that from me.

Now I'm trying to rethink how I can be a better person. I guess liking to talk because I'm passionate about something is one thing, but being unable to shut up on the subject is another.

I guess in a sense, after thinking about that over, I seem kind of lonely. It's like, I have to talk to myself to keep my own self company. Sure, I know I'm not COMPLETELY alone, but when it comes to another being besides God, it certainly feels like it.

I think it's okay to feel that way. It just makes me feel a little sad that I have to limit myself on something I really like to do just so I don't get on the nerves of the people I care about.

At least love makes me feel better about it. <3 I always feel happy again after wards.

So the other day, after finishing my shower I head over to my mom's bedroom to find a comb to brush my hair, I noticed the window blinds were open. My mom tells me it's okay to leave it open during the day, but at night when I want the light son, the windows have to be closed, because then people can see me if I'm there. Well, I didn't feel like closing the blinds at that time, and I figured I wouldn't hang around too long, so being seen wouldn't be too much of a problem, but then I thought.. What if in the brief moment when I'm combing my hair, someone broke through the window with a gun and gunned me down?! More importantly, I wonder what would happen if I screamed. Surely, my sister who was upstairs who might (or might NOT, since it's not possible she would ignore my scream of horror as if it were nothing) hear it might come running downstairs to check on the commotion. If that happened, she would be shot too, right? In that case scenario, I would like her to run. Don't check up on me, run, because I don't want you to be next. o_o

Isn't that a hard decision to make right then and there? To tell someone not to check what's happening as someone's getting assaulted because you value their life? Like, technically, Tomo, if you're reading this, this is what I'm saying: If you hear me screaming and gunshots or something, don't check up on me. Go run and find help. )X

This is scary. I almost want to cry. -dork- Because I'm scared, or something.

It's just like if there's a code red at school or something and the gunman somehow broke into your classroom and starts shooting, what are you supposed to do? At first I thought playing dead would be the obvious answer, because uh, then the guy would think I'm dead when I'm faking it, right? But how are you going to keep your breathing all calm as that happens? Moreover, what if the guy wants to make sure you're dead, and SHOOTS you another time just to make sure? You can't really get up and run, either. That's sure death right there, too.

Darnit, why do mean people have to come and threaten everyone's life all of a sudden like that?

Watching America's Most Shocking videos or something had nothing to do with this. XD I just realized that watching that yesterday was a funny coincidence. Dangerous people just come out of nowhere, it's scary.

On a lighter note! Well, it's still more ramblings on my wonders, but while I was playing solitaire many times and losing, I was wondering if every hand, as in, every game of solitaire, has a possibility of being winnable. Like, obviously, sometimes you might be unlucky enough to get a whole game where nothing can be done, but what about bad hands? I always wonder, as I pull a card from the deck to place it somewhere, "Will it be good to use it now? Would the card I need later in the future appear when I pull this card, or will pulling this card blow that chance away?" I somehow feel Solitaire, while it is a game of chance, is also a game of timing. One move could change the whole game for you later. It can make it, or break the game for you.

AND THEN I THOUGHT ABOUT how that was sort of like real life. I mean, we make choices in our lives, some more important than others, but like, sometimes people just end up wondering what would happen if they chose that, uhm, "other path". I use that allusion/metaphor a lot, and here I'm using it somewhat differently. What if we lived our lives the other way? Reminds me of Chrono Cross, where you get to visit that other world. EXCEPT I NEVER BEAT IT OR GOT TOO FAR SO I WOULDN'T KNOW.

Anyway, just some things I was wondering about. I always have questions wtf. )X

Well, it was done on a whim 'cause someone wanted it and it wasn't around, so...

futari_fansubs was looking for staff members, and I've been wondering what a timer/typesetter does, since I've been considering about doing that for awhile now. I can't translate Japanese, since I don't know anything about tee language (except for the stuff you pick up from watching enough shows, but that doesn't really count), but I've always been impressed with how fansubbers devote their time to subbing, and I kind of have been wanting to help. After finding out what a timer was, I kind of thought I could maybe do that. Just match text with time. o3o That's probably harder than I think. XD

Anyway, the point is I've been playing around with Aegisub for the past few days and after going through lots of troubles and difficulties, I sort of pulled it off, I think. The Japanese characters aren't in sync sometimes, but overall, I'm happy. XD

I don't know how to encode. I didn't even know the word O_O After subbing T&T's SAMURAI, the file came out to be like, 3.91 GB. O_O WHAT IS THAT. THE ORIGINAL FILE WAS LIKE ONLY 68 MB! I tutorialed it on fansubbers.org and got it down to 151 MB, but I still feel that's too big for a PV. I think I can forgive myself, though, since I'm new to this. O_O; APPARENTLY TIMERS/TYPESETTERS DON'T NEED TO ENCODE AT ALL. -dork- I should have known; there's a separate job for that in a fansub group, now that I think about it. Oh well. I kind of wanted to see the fruits of my labor in action.

I doubt she'd check this or anything, but I feel it to be necessary. nightly_001 put up with all my newbie questions and trouble shooting, but thank you so much for getting me introduced to (sort-of) subbing! n____________n

Of course I've been keeping up! XD I lost June 8's, but then found it, so I stuck it here with the rest of the mess.

June 8, 2008
June 14, 2008
June 15, 2008
June 16, 2008
June 17, 2008
June 18, 2008
June 19, 2008
June 20, 2008
June 21, 2008
June 22, 2008
June 23,2008
June 24, 2008
June 25, 2008
June 26, 2008
June 27, 2008

( The rest is just normal entry stuff. n____n )

http://hotimg20.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_060908-vi.jpg June 9, 2008
http://hotimg15.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_061008-vi.jpg June 10, 2008
http://hotimg15.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_061108-vi.jpg June 11, 2008
http://hotimg19.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_061208-vi.jpg June 12, 2008
http://hotimg16.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_061308-vi.jpg June 13, 2008

I'm quite aware of the fact that sometimes I draw Zombb with antennae, and sometimes I don't. XD

( Uhhh rambling )
UNRELATED

So I have this journal-sort of thing I started writing in some years ago sitting in this pretty pink heavy-duty paper bag I received for my birthday from my aunt in my room. I wondered how long it's been since I last wrote in it, and though on most days I usually forget to tackle that curiosity, today, I remembered. ^^

Turns out the last time I wrote in it was ONLY two years ago. (Why does it feel so much longer than that?) I hope to maybe write some more in it later today, or sometime this week or so. This particular journal holds a special sentimental feeling for me; I wrote in it specifically to demonstrate self growth. I read the only two entries I've written in it, and I see that a lot of values I had then are the same as the ones I do have now, but some ways of thinking have drastically changed. I noticed that was written around my all-time low confidence streak, and now I'm a bit more confident, or rather, I hope I am more confident now. ^^ In any case, I should get to it sometime soon. I thought it was a stupid idea at the time, and maybe it still is right now, but I did it anyway, and it'd be a nice thing to respond to.

It's a long entry, so here are my artgrind submissions for yesterday and today. I didn't submit yesterday, but I did draw something. ^^;

http://hotimg14.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_060608456.jpg June 6, 2008
http://hotimg14.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_060708-vi.jpg  June 7, 2008

I organized it in parts so it's a bit easier to navigate. XD

The day before yesterday, I got myself introduced to the group Kanjani8. Although the group remains largely unknown to others, I kind of felt like I was lost in whatever obsession it was to most girls. I'd recognize a thumbnail of Nishikido Ryo as someone's avatar, but I'd be all up in the air as to which of the other 7 (or sometimes 6) were also named.

It's funny that I can trace this new-found discovery back to some car commercial (Not sure if it was car, exactly). The song "Secret Agent Man" was playing, and I went on Youtube to search it up. (I do this often whenever I hear a song I think I might like.) I'm a little ashamed to admit it, but I never knew the song existed. I had a friend whose screenname for something was something like "Secret Asian Man", and I saw a comic in the newspaper titled the same thing. SO NATURALLY I THOUGHT THE SONG WAS SECRET ASIAN MAN. XD Anyway, it's a funny song, but not something I could listen over and over on repeat like I do with some songs. =o

So, what do I find? A Japanese version of the song. XD I click on it just to hear what it sounds like, since familiar songs in different languages are always a fun listen. I browse through the comments a bit whild the video plays, and see numerous mentions of adorable this Ryo-chan was even at that age. Already I'm cycling through my head, so he -MUST- be older and probably a singer by now, right? So I search -him- up, and get some videos, most noticably, his solo where he sort of.. unbuttons his shirt. I don't think that was such a great introduction for me, but the song was pretty good. XD I browsed through some other videos with him in it, but I don't think I watched them all that much or I just didn't like the songs as much as I did with the Spirits song. I did sort of pick up the fact that he was in Kanjani8, though at that time I didnt' bother to find out who they were.

I don't remember why I started searching the Kanjani8 (I searched up KAT-TUN first) up Wednesday. I think I wanted some new fast-paced music. o3o I *THINK* I looked up David Tao first. I can't remember if he was Cantonese or Mandarin, but his music is amaaazing. I loved Wu Liang Bao (Augh.. spelling. @_@) and his duet with Jolin Tsai, Jin Tian Ni Yao Jia Gei Wo. Then, afterwards, I was wondering what this famed KAT-TUN was all about, because it showed up in the Youtube side bar thing a lot. I thought its member, Akanishi Jin was part of this other group called KinKi Kids, whom Jackie showed me a PV of, but I guess it was a different guy. ^^; Anyway, my attention soon shifted to Kanjani8, since KAT-TUN is quite closely associated with that group, I believe. -shrug- Plus, I would recognize at least one guy-- Nishikido Ryo! XD I guess I'm not too good with faces, I need at least one guy I'm familiar with when I watch something.

I watched mainly the PVs, since I kind of don't care too much for live performances. XD; I liked most of whatever ones were out, namely Wahaha, It's My Soul, and some other ones I can't seem to remember the name. They're funny, upbeat songs, and I like that, since I don't do too well with slow songs, for some reason. (Some go by me fine, though ^^;) I watched Wahaha first, ('cause my sister might have thought the name was funny, and we should watch that first XD) and instantly I recognize Ryo. (He's hard to miss, isn't it?) The boy with the black frayed hair and crooked teeth was my favorite, though, and I went ahead to look at the other videos to try and find him, BUT I COULDN'T. I searched up photos to hopefully get his name, but aside from Ryo, Subaru, and you, I had NO IDEA who the rest of the group were. XD THEY ALL LOOK SO SIMILAR.

So, yesterday, I searched up even more videos with Kanjani8, including the live performances. I watched some, because I knew they did more live performances than PVs.. (am I correct? XD) I just watched video after video just so I could find Shingo, since to me, he was always hard to find. I think he's not as popular as Subaru, You, or the loved Ryo, 'cause I don't see much talk about him. XD In any case, I even watched the Japanese drama he played in, Dive to the Future to familiarize myself with him.

Uh, that movie was so hard for me to watch because in my opinion, dramas are really corny. XD My sister was watching one all day, and I didn't understand why she'd waste her time like that, EVEN THOUGH IT'S SUMMER AND SHE'S BOUND TO BE BORED SOONER OR LATER. However, the main reason why it was hard to watch is because it's a diving movie, all the guys wears Speedos. Yeeecch. I can't stand it; it's so scaaary. I had to look away from the video sometimes. Plus, Shingo's hair was long in that one, and I don't like long hair on him at aall. XDD

The FUNNIEST thing about watching it, though, is before the movie started, there was this ad with some man relaxing in a mudbath. I was like, just staring in disbelief, then.. SOMEONE EMERGES FROM THE MUD BATH. Then I was like, NO THIS IS TOO SCARY and I hit back. After that I was thinking, "Hey, it sounded like an ad, what if the movies after it?" So I click forward, and there the man in the mud bath was again! I hit back again, because it was scary. Hahah. I didn't want to see the man or the person emerging from the mudbath or the strange man announcing the purpose/product of the advertisement. At last, I figured I'd just.. pay no attention to the ad, so once again, I click forward. Even though I didn't see the scene, I hated hearing the advertisement. I don't even know what it was about! XD

I'm not too crazy about live performances, but hell, I sure wish I -could- dance. I know everyone loves Ryo, and I do admit he's good-looking, but he doesn't strike my interest. XD -shot- Nope, Shingo's my favorite, though it was terribly difficult for me to differentiate him from the other five or four, because he was always changing his hair. At least that many of the group dye or bleach their hair for the same performance. The only way I could recognize Shingo is by his teeth! It's such a strange way to identify someone, I think, but I always notice teeth since I've had dental problems for a long, long time. XD Shou from Kishidan/DJ Ozma was identified by the teeth, too, though it's obvious the hair asks for so much more attention. XD So, whenever I watched the Kanjani8 videos, I paid clooose attention to find those charming crooked teeth of Shingo's! Thanks to my sister, we found his whole name, too. XD Before it was just like, "THE CUTE GUY WITH CROOKED TEETH".

Anyway, the point after all that is that I now know who the Kanjani8 are, and feel like there's a part of this world's culture that I never knew about finally sunk into some form of knowledge. Hahah! But most importantly, I can recognize who Murakami Shingo is. n________n I don't think I'm a crazed fan of this group like many others, though, but I do like some of their songs. ^^;

KITTENS

My mom called me down yesterday in the afternoon because, apparently, there were kittens living under our patio! I've never seen kittens in real life before (I'M DEPRIVED OF THIS WORLD AND I KNOW IT) and they were soooooo cute. T_T They look so fluffy and everything. I just wanted to go out and hold one, but the mama looked pretty angry. XD Apparently, while I'm at school, my mom and sister see this fat cat hanging around in our backyard numerous times, and it turns out she was pregnant. I'm left out on this encounter, because my mom immediately noticed the mother cat was really skinny now, due to giving birth to the kittens. Anyway, the kittens must have been there for quite some time without our knowing, because they did have fur and could walk. They were playing around with our garden things like it was their playground. It was soooo cuuuute! >w<" My mom asked me what we should do, and right away, I answered, "CALL ANIMAL CONTROL. THEY CAN FIX THIS." My mom doesn't want to cause such an uproar with them, I think, so my idea was shot down. Eventually, we figured they'd go away once they were old enough, which should be soon since they all could walk and such.

>w< I want a kitty, but our family isn't good with animals or pets, unless they're fish. Maybe I can save this story for another day. I already rambled too much, and even if no one reads this, when I go back to this for a nice blast from the past, there's only so much I can take in, I think. XD

You know, when I think about it, those kittens are growing up in poverty. Their mama is a stray who just gave birth to them in someone's backyard, and who knows how she got those kittens in the first place. The poor things are playing around in their poverty-stricken area, garden things, and thinking it's their playground and all because they're children and don't understand the poor situation they're in.

Coming home yesterday, my mother told me she told a co-worker about the kittens and asked what we should do. The answer? Call animal control and they'll neuter those kittens so more aren't birthed. (X

GRADUATION

CONGRATULATIONS TO MY CLASS OF 2008. (X Highschool graduation was yesterday, and I didn't attend it because I didn't wnat to. o3o A lot of friends and folk were in disbelief regarding my decision, but my parents were fine with it. I only feel bad now 'cause my mom sounds like she wanted to go. Did she want to go that badly? I wish she would have told me. She said she's worried I'll regret it later in life, but I don't think so. College is more important, and I'll be sure to attend that graduation ceremony. (If I graduate XD)

http://hotimg15.fotki.com/a/71_80/233_157/zombb_060508.jpg

Not so very successful attempt at perspective. XD